I don’t know how am I gonna react to this. But seriously, Aleen, thanks a lot. Thanks for dragging me down this shit and had your phone borrowed to someone else.

I totally hate it when I lend my phone to people and they, without my permission goes on reading my text messages. Fuck you. That’s why I had passwords. Now I gotta be beware.

Next up, you. I felt sorry, because of saying those nasty things behind your back. At the same time, I can’t stand the way you do stuffs either. In the past I wouldn’t. So is it me who have changed or is it you? I don’t know. Say it in your face? I said, but you couldn’t accept it what. So what’s the point there? Seriously, lol. Oh yes, about that, I’ve never once wanted to tell anybody about it. My bad for knowing. I didn’t even expect it to be that content when I’m gonna read. After knowing I felt so pressurise and it took me days to get over and stop thinking though it’s not about me. Get it? Like knowing somethings you shouldn’t know, shit. I don’t know how to face you and I’m feeling as worse as you do. First time I’m facing this shit seriously. -.-

Tell me? Who’s wrong now? My bad partly, how about you? Basic respect for people’s privacy, where’s yours? Please. Curiosity, but don’t ever read. Can? Bullshit seriously. -_-

I feel hurt for losing you. But I can’t do anything. I apologised, but can see that you’re not gonna give a damn. Uh huh, so what now? All Aleen do is saying sorry which made me feel so fucked up as well. I don’t feel good either, yet I had to try to act like I don’t care. WTS?

Reason why I changed the link. Yeah.

I always kept in mind that I have to be on my own whenever and wherever. Don’t ever rely on anybody because no one really bother. Probably there would’ve been a few there for me, without fail, the girls. But when it comes to my clique, I find it so unreal. It seems like everyone’s doing something behind each of our back. Finally now, I understood what she’d felt earlier on during the conflict period. Few weeks left till we really separate.

It’s in the middle of the night going to dawn in a few hours, and I’m not asleep but posting how confused and messed up I am ever since August began. It’s like nightmares officially commenced to make me feel horrible deliberately. All those awful stuffs, followed on one after another. Still can’t get over it sometimes.

The day before, I broke down right after my Math P1, because I know how badly I’ve done and the tears just fall unknowingly when I got out of the hall. I tried to hold it back but, I couldn’t take it anymore so I just release it all out at once. Guess what one of my friends said when I cried?

“Are you that weak?”

Laughs, yes I am. Smiling everyday and holding back my tears every single time when things are killing me inside really bad, is considered being strong to you guys? Everyone has their own soft spot, so do I. You guys did well for your papers and cheering over there, yes definitely I’m happy for you guys. But here I am being so disappointed over my performance, I really couldn’t afford to join you guys to cheer on. I felt so petrified at that moment of having the need to enter ITE. But did you guys even try to understand from that torn pair of shoes of mine? Those comforting words were appreciated but you won’t really understand how I’m feeling that moment. I didn’t even dare to show how happy I was when I received my MT results, because I didn’t want to make you guys feel worse either. Imagine you’re one of the only few people that scored distinctions. And because I’m trying to be considerate, not to show my happiness and be neutral, you said I was showing face to you guys. Ridiculous isn’t it? I realise I’ve never once voiced out my perspective to any of you, and this is why you guys won’t bother to consider my feelings at all? It doesn’t matter now since it’s all over. Everything is coming to an end, finally.

Now, I just wish to pass my Math for the least, and get As for Humanities and Sciences. I’ll try my best to get this done with, I’ll leave the rest to God like how she told me. Have faith, he’ll do it just for any of us who believes in him. Bless me.